while digging up my old (2006!) post of top 10 annoyances of living in a thomas kinkade custom home, i stumbled on two likewise old posts, based on a news article i read (alas, the link is dead, so i can’t point to it anymore) about a subdivision in development (again, in 2006) that was only for christians. yesterday, i reposted my list of the top 10 annoyances of living in this subdivision; and today, with tongue-firmly-planted-in-cheek, i give you…
the top 10 benefits of living in a christian subdivision
10. no political signs on lawns, since everyone votes the same.
9. the only homo here is homogeneity.
8. zero pressure to witness.
7. mormon and jehovah’s witness doorbell ringers are swallowed up by mysterious sidewalk-crack-of-turin.
6. one school for every home (because they’re right there in the homes!)
5. your best lawn now.
4. the potential of being featured in a michael moore documentary.
3. no lawnmowers waking you up on sunday mornings.
2. cool signs that say “caution! children being raptured!”
and #1: purpose-driven curbs.