worst church junk idea of the month

behold the scripture, “the eye is the lamp of the body. if your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light.” (matthew 6:22) this is the basis for these beauties. i wish they had a pic of adam and eve actually wearing them, pre-foliage-clothing!

11 thoughts on “worst church junk idea of the month”

  1. Christian Marketer: “We need to think of another idea, these Testamints are just not selling anymore!”

    Random Lackey: “I know! Winter is coming around and people are going to need sunglasses. Let me look up a verse on eyes…Got one!”

    Christian Marketer: “That’s it! Let’s put a Jesus fish on the side and voila! Marketing gold.”

  2. I’m personally eager for the version of them that has the “speck” in one lens and the “beam” in the other. (ref Matt 7:3)

    I think the preliminary name for them is “Specks”… get it? Like, specs? Like spectacals? Get it like specks in the specs?? sweeeet!

    Man, it’s a shame that I’m not more tasteless. I’d be a gazillionaire …

  3. You are surprised by this???

    I’ve read in more than one source that the Hebrew/Yiddish idea behind the “eye” thing is about how generous one is. If you have a good eye, you are a generous person. If you have a dim or bad eye, you’re stingy. This makes perfect sense in context of that scripture quote.


  4. so blue is a boy color and red is a girl color after all. i thought God told me that in the second grade but i wasn’t sure until now. glad i know.

  5. I think you should make a category for these – that way when important occasions roll around and I need gift ideas I can come to one source for all of the best Jesus Junk.

  6. Just think. We could take any peice of scripture, make it into clothing or some other gadget and make millions!

    I’m going to start my Leviticus line of clothing!

  7. Why wasn’t stellar company represented in the NYWC Exhibit Hall this year, right next to the Church Marketing Sucks booth would have been the perfect place. Oh well maybe next year!

Leave a Reply