it’s been a LONG time since i’ve posted a JJOTM award. crazy.
early this year, my friend heather flies told me she had a gift for me. actually, we were in reno for the CORE premiere, and dave ambrose and i were chillin’ in our hotel room, waiting for the rest of the gang to arrive so we could go to dinner. heather called and said she has a gift for me, and can she come to our room. sure. after showing up, heather proceeded to say we needed to turn the lights off. needless to say, dave and i were confused, and growing concerned. innocent-and-pure heather was only trying to prepare the room for the wonder that is: the “miraculous” jesus nightlight. (nice use of quotation marks, by the way, since there isn’t — when one looks closely — anything resembling a true miracle occuring with this nightlight.)
a little light shines on the white (of course) concave surface. but when you look at it, your brain interprets it as convex (outie, not innie), and the head of our risen christ turns and follows you as you move about it. it’s fantastic, and it’s jesus junk, all at the same time.
however, i think this marketing claim is highly debateable:
Your children will love this nightlight, as Jesus appears to be watching over them wherever they are. Your children may (like mine) receive comfort, security, and relief from those sleepless and scary nights.
dude, the thing is FREAKY! “your children” are much more likely to scream out to you, in the middle of the night, “mommy! daddy! jesus is scaring me! he keeps moving his head around! turn him off! i am not receiving comfort, security or relief!”
(ht to the wittenburg blog)
6 thoughts on “jesus junk of the month award”
i see that you refer to it as “the “miraculous” Jesus nighlight”. is the “t” of night left out on purpose? because it makes it even better (and more christian ghetto) if it is…”Jesus is nigh”…no matter whether he is convex, concave, freindly or freaky…he’s always nigh!
There is a huge statue like this in Gatlinburg at a wax museum. The carving is cool…the nighlight, a little scary.
joel — nice theory. but it was just me being unmiraculous in my typing!
I absolutely must have one of those for my church office.
this reminds me of the row of busts at the haunted mansion in disneyland. they should add this one to that row.
just one of the hundreds of thousands of reasons to love Heather Flies.