i haven’t posted a mcsweeney’s list in a long time. but this one caught my eye!
BY JILL BRONFMAN
Entextophobia: the fear that you may send a private text to everyone you know.
Zonotophobia: the fear that you cannot text because the wireless is down.
Juvenophobia: the fear that you will be the last of your friends who is allowed to text.
Mytextophobia: the fear that everyone will move on just as you figure out how to text.
Thumophobia: the fear that you will lose the ability to text in a freak kitchen accident.
Czechophobia: the fear that your text will be spell-checked so as to be unintelligible.
Fopahophobia: the fear that your text will be spell-checked with an embarrassing word substitution.
Bebacophobia: the fear that your text partner will never return from the restroom.