the second book published by The Youth Cartel is officially out (ha! we’re a real publisher!). it’s a feisty little book of snark and giggles, by steve case, called The Youth Cartel’s Unauthorized Dictionary of Youth Ministry.

how ’bout i give you a sampler platter of a handful of my favorites, from the Hs through the Ns:

H is for…

Heresy
The thing your little side comment during Bible study became when it finally got back to your senior pastor.

Hope
Cling to it. You’ll find that kid. Hide and Seek can’t go on for more than 24 hours. #craftcabinet #boilerroom #communionwine

I is for…

Interview

• Don’t bring your dog.
• Don’t have burritos beforehand.
• Don’t laugh when they ask for references.
• Don’t start any story with, “This one time when we were on the roof …”

K is for…

Kitchen
The most holy and sacred place in the church building (be¬sides the secretary’s desk, of course). Whatever you place in this room will disappear. Actually, whatever anyone places in this room will disappear, but your students will be blamed. So avoid this room at all costs.

M is for…

Matthew
Disciple. Tax collector. The money guy of the group. The one disciple who was always on Jesus’ case about keeping the receipts.

Minister
You may often hear the question, “You’re almost 30 (40, 50). When are you going to become a real minister?” You can usually answer with, “You’re almost 70 (80, 90). When are you going to break your hip?”

N is for…

Negative Parents
When paired with positive parents, you can complete an electrical circuit. #staygrounded

Nyquil®
#longcardrives #letsplaythequietgame

i’ll post more in the weeks to come. and, you can order the whole thing here!